In my Bible study, recently (No Other Gods by Kelly Minter), Kelly was talking about the biblical story of Jacob, Leah & Rachel, and how both of these women had their sights set on their (functional) ‘gods’: Leah’s ‘god’ was Jacob (his love), and Rachel’s ‘god’ was bearing children.
What stood out most to me, though, was this:
How many of us settle for so much less than what’s available to us,
simply because our sights are set on the wrong Source?
Leah’s sights were set on what Jacob could do for her, rather than on how God was answering her desires and healing her pain… in His way.
Rachel’s sights were set on the fact that her lack of children made her feel ‘less than’, rather than being grateful to God that she had the love and devotion of her husband, Jacob.
Both of these women were consumed by their false gods. They couldn’t (wouldn’t) see how God was actually present and active in their lives.
I think, then, of my own life… and the things that I’m focused on or striving after. Where am I discontent? What am I looking to for satisfaction and fulfillment?
… Leah thought that ‘if only’ she could have Jacob’s affection, then she’d be satisfied.
… Rachel thought that ‘if only’ she could bear children, then she’d be satisfied.
I often think, ‘if only’ I could …
- be successful in my business (earning money)
- have a better house
- have a more reliable vehicle
- lose the excess weight…
… then I’d be satisfied.
I’m striving. I am looking to earthly things and accomplishments for satisfaction, fulfillment, and peace.
Yet, I’ve had these things that I wanted, before… but I’ve not found satisfaction.
Reason being, God alone can fully satisfy. No person, place, thing, or accomplishment will ever suffice! Only God being our everything — above all else — will ever bring the kind of fulfillment we seek.
It’s okay to want those other things — a healthy home, a loving marriage, a well-cared-for body, a thriving career — so long as we don’t seek them more than we seek God… so long as we remember that the only thing we truly need is God, alone. Everything else is merely icing on the cake — an added blessing! (“Seek ye first the Kingdom of God… and all these things will be added unto you.” – Matthew 6:33)
As long as we feel we need anything other than God, we will be discontent, striving, and chasing ‘idols’. But if we believe that we need nothing but God to be satisfied, then everything else becomes simply a blessing given to us from Him! (not earned of our own merit or action).
I don’t need a thriving business… because God has promised to provide for all of my needs. Yet, He has blessed me with this gift of being able to use my talents and skills in service to Him. God gave people work so that they could have a sense of accomplishment over the work of their hands, and something with which to fill their days. I, personally, am blessed to be chosen to use my gifts for Him in this way!
I also don’t need weight loss in order to be acceptable or loved or admired, as God loves and accepts me as I am. However, God also calls us to be good stewards of these earthly bodies so that we can carry out His Kingdom plans, and He wants us to seek Him for comfort — not food. Food has also become a false ‘god’ for me.
. . . . . . . . . . . . .
Father, forgive me for setting my sights on all of these other things — looking to them for satisfaction — when only You are the true answer! I praise You for Your grace, mercy & patience with me, Lord. Thank you! Amen.
(Note: This post contains Affiliate links. Please see my Disclaimer page for more information).
One of my favorite things to do is to recommend books! I used to read –on average– 80 books per year ((grins)). So, I’ve got quite the collection to pull from.
Here are 14 amazing Christian Living books I’d recommend:
- Crash the Chatterbox – Steven Furtick
- Brazen: The Courage to Find the You That’s Been Hiding – Leanna Tankersley
- Girls With Swords – Lisa Bevere
- What Keeps You Up At Night? – Pete Wilson
- If: Trading Your If-Only Regrets For God’s What-If Possibilities – Mark Batterson
- Grace For the Good Girl – Emily P. Freeman
- Practicing the Presence of Jesus – Wally Armstrong
- Battle Ready – Kelly Balarie
- The God-First Life – Stovall Weems
- Sacred Pathways: Discover Your Soul’s Path to God – Gary Thomas
- Girl Meets God: A Memoir – Lauren Winner
- Jesus in the Margins – Rick McKinley
- The Beautiful Fight – Gary Thomas
- The Jesus of Suburbia – Mike Erre
So many people have a ton of great ideas — they just have no idea which of these they should pursue, and they are terrified of getting it “wrong” — of choosing the “wrong” thing.
There are, however, ways to move forward, and feel confident in your decision. Here are 3 tips to help you choose…
1 | THERE IS NO WRONG CHOICE
Sure, whatever you choose may or may not be a right fit for you. But, you had to make that choice in order to make that discovery. It’s a lesson, so learn it and then move on to the next thing. Know that you can always make another choice … you are never stuck.
2 | YOU MUST TAKE ACTION
Just going over and over the options inside of your head will never do you any good. It only serves to make you frustrated, and leaves you going around in circles (speaking from experience!). The only way to truly know if something will or will not work for you is to get out of your head, and do something with your options.
Maybe you try this new job or path for a while (an internship, perhaps?). Or, maybe you talk to someone already working in that line of work about what it’s really like, day-to-day. You could even try shadowing someone at their job, for a time, to get a feel for the type of work and its environment.
But again, you must get out of your head if you want to truly find your answer.
3 | MAKE TWO LISTS
Several years ago, when I was stuck in a job that I hated, I got out a piece of paper and make two lists: Jobs I’d Loved & Jobs I’d Hated (really, it was more like lists of tasks at each of my previous jobs that I’d either enjoyed or couldn’t stand). I listed out everything I could think of, whether these jobs had been paid, or volunteer, or even just odd jobs done for family members. Some of the items on my lists included:
Loved: lots of sunlight | freedom to make decisions | no strict dress code | able to generate ideas.
Hated: micromanaging boss | confined to a single spot all day | uniforms | being on-call.
Having these two lists, and the awareness these gave me, helped my next job to be so much better! It was near-perfect for me (as far as 9-to-5’s go). I had a ton of autonomy, didn’t have to get dressed up, was never called to cover a shift, and my boss was pretty cool!
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Really, the main point to remember is that you can always make a different choice. Heck, what I went to school for isn’t even close to what I now do for a living! But it took a lot of trial and error to figure out my true path. Nevertheless, I’ve found it and can now confidently reassure you that you, too, will eventually find your way.
LEAVE A COMMENT and tell me three of the options you are currently considering. I’d love to hear about what interests you!
When you read about entrepreneurship, or start looking into becoming self-employed, you’ll hear the usual things: set up a website, have a social media presence, understand your target market, and make sure there’s a need for what you want to offer. And, sure — all of those things are important.
But there’s a whole other side to self-employment that no one really talks about! There are skills you need that no one prepares you for, and there is stuff that comes up that you weren’t expecting.
Here are 9 things that took me by surprise in this entrepreneurial journey, so that you can be better aware of what to expect:
1 | THOSE CLOSEST TO YOU (FRIENDS, FAMILY, SPOUSE) WILL PROBABLY NOT BE SUPPORTIVE OF YOUR DREAM
They’re certainly not going to be as passionate or excited about it as you are… but, that’s okay, as it’s not their dream — it’s yours!
It helps to get yourself into Entrepreneur groups — surround yourself with others who get what you’re going through — and to turn to them with your highs and lows in business.
Family will probably worry about you and, meaning well, encourage you to go out and get a “real job”. Don’t let that deter you. Just know that they aren’t going to understand, and continue to do your thing.
2 | YOU WILL NEED RESILIENCE & PERSEVERANCE TO BE SUCCESSFUL
As an Entrepreneur, you will learn that failures are simply a part of the success process… so long as you learn from them. If you keep getting up, and keep pressing forward — if you’re willing to fight to see your dreams realized — then, in time, you will succeed. You just have to be willing to do whatever it takes to keep going.
3 | (ALMOST) NONE OF IT IS ABOUT YOU
This one really took me by surprise. When I first became self-employed, it was all about me — how much money I could make, what kinds of things I wanted to do or liked doing, colors and fonts and design styles that matched my tastes.
Yet, over time, I’ve come to realize that it’s really about the audience I want to help. They, after all, are the ones with the power to determine whether what I’m offering is worthy of their time, or worth their hard-earned dollars.
My audience and their needs and desires are the most important factor… everything I do as an Entrepreneur must take them into consideration. What do they struggle with, and how can I help? What colors and designs appeal to them? What do they want or need to learn about through my content? What will they see as valuable? It’s all about serving my audience.
4 | YOU MUST GIVE IF YOU WANT TO RECEIVE — SOW, IF YOU WANT TO REAP
A common misconception of new entrepreneurs is that you can set up a website, and put up this great sales page with your amazing offer, and — bam! — you’ll start making the big bucks! Yet, it doesn’t work that way. Firstly, because you need to actually tell people that your offer exists (they won’t just stumble across it, and be amazed), and secondly because, when you’re first starting out, people don’t yet know you. In order for them to buy from you, they first need to have a good understanding of who you are (as a business) and what you can do for them (see point #3, above). So, patience is needed, while you educate others about your business. Which brings me to the next point…
5 | THERE IS SO MUCH WRITING!
They say “content is king” — and for good reason. In order for your audience to get to know and like you, they need to be educated on who you are and what you are offering them. You need to show them that you know what they’re dealing with, and why you are the best person to help them solve that problem. How you do this, as an online entrepreneur, is through writing.
You write content for your website and blog, you write posts for social media, you write content for your email newsletter, you write copy for landing pages and sales pages and ads … it feels as if writing is your main job, even though you never signed up to be a “writer”! (Don’t like to write? That’s okay — you can hire someone to do it for you. But be aware that, first, you’ll need to be clear on your message, and on the tone you are wishing to convey).
6 | MARKETING AND SALES ARE KEY SKILLS YOU MUST HAVE (OR BUILD)
A lot of people have a really negative view of sales, and think “marketing” is a complicated thing. Thus, they try to avoid these two skills. Yet, the reality is, most of us are just misinformed about what each of these things really is, and we only have our experiences with others’ attempts at these to base our knowledge off of.
Based on what I’ve learned:
Marketing is simply creating awareness of your business, and what you can offer other people. That’s it, in a nutshell (not so complicated, huh?).
Sales, on the other hand, is simply educating others about what your offer can do for them, and then giving them options, and the choice of whether or not this is right for them, at this time. The idea that sales is “pushy, icky, slimy, convincing, or coercing” is wrong. When sales is done correctly — from a place of being of service to your customer, and allowing them to choose what’s right for them — it takes all of the “ick” out of it, and ends up being a win-win for everyone involved.
And truth be told, you cannot have a “business” if you aren’t willing to sell, or to marketing your offerings. These are foundational skills.
7 | YOUR PERSONAL GROWTH GAME WILL BE STRENGTHENED
… that is, so long as you’re willing to stay in the fight, and keep pressing forward!
I never would have imagined how much being an Entrepreneur would grow me, personally. It really is more about who you’ll become in the process, than what you do. I’ve become more patient, more resilient, mentally stronger, and I’ve developed more of a servant’s heart through running my own business.
There are also many mindsets and limiting beliefs you’ll need to work through in order to grow and succeed. It’s definitely not easy! But it is so very, very worth it.
8 | COACHES, MENTORS, & GUIDES ARE KEY TO MAKING PROGRESS
… and I’m not just including this point because I am a coach/mentor/guide! I honestly wouldn’t be where I am, today, if it weren’t for the wonderful people and coaches who gave me their time and shared their wisdom and insights with me, along the way.
There were times, in my journey thus far, where I was so confused and frustrated, and I could not see a way forward. Yet, in reaching out to, and then talking through things with these coaches and other entrepreneurs, they helped me to untangle the messes inside my head, work through the mindsets or beliefs that were holding me back, and they gave me the encouragement and support I needed to remember why I’d started on this journey in the first place. I am forever grateful to each and every one of them for their help!
Side note: I didn’t always have the money to hire someone, so I took advantage of the free 30-minute calls offered by these fellow entrepreneurs — often in exchange for a testimonial they could use. So know that, no matter what, the help that you need is always available. However, if you can afford it, I also highly believe in the value of investing in a coach. You gain so much clarity and confidence in being open and vulnerable with someone else, and letting them hold you accountable!
9 | STRUCTURE, SCHEDULES, & TIME MANAGEMENT AREN’T REALLY THE “EVILS” WE WANT TO BELIEVE THEY ARE
I’ve always been fiercely independent, and hated limits and being “confined” in any way. In fact, like many who branch out on their own as Entrepreneurs, they whole reason I wanted to be self-employed was so that I could have the freedom to do things my own way, on my own schedule, and without the restrictions one typically finds in a traditional work environment.
Yet, after several years of “winging it” — doing whatever I felt like doing, each day, without any real rhyme or reason — and not seeing the kind of success I’d hoped for, I came to realize that it really is important for entrepreneurs to create (and then follow) some kind of schedule.
Without structure, it is really easy to lose whole days “lost in the scroll” on social media, or to spend your time working on things that seem important but aren’t really moving your business forward, or creating income (again, speaking from experience, here!).
One of my favorite time management / scheduling hacks is Michael Hyatt’s “ideal week” (you can read more about that, here). He groups similar tasks together, and then assigns them to days of the week. So, for example: Mondays might be for marketing & promotion, Wednesdays for research & development, and Fridays for content creation (writing, recording videos, etc).
Personally, I love how flexible this method is — allowing me to still choose what I’ll do on any given day, and how much time I will devote to each thing, so long as it falls under that day’s category. It allows me to still work according to my moods, and to not feel confined.
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LEAVE A COMMENT and let me know which of these stands out as most surprising to you! Or, if you’re already self-employed, I’d love to hear what you, yourself, discovered in your journey that the “business” books hadn’t prepared you for.
“Transformation is often more about unlearning than learning.” – Richard Rohr
We live in an age with an abundance of information. It comes at us from everywhere — home, church, school, work, online — it’s no wonder so many of us have lost sight of / gotten so confused about who we really are!
For a lot of my younger years, I attended church and Christian schools. It wasn’t until college that I started to learn that there were other worldviews that existed.
Throughout my twenties and thirties, a lot of time was spent maybe not “unlearning” the things I was taught, but rather seeking to take hold of what was true, and releasing what wasn’t. I needed to come to my own conclusions about what I believed, instead of blindly accepting everything others had taught me, without questioning it.
And yes, through this process of questioning and choosing, my life was transformed. It brought a maturity and a strength I hadn’t previously had.
LEAVE A COMMENT and tell me what you need to “unlearn” (or question) in order to grow.
Yesterday, I started reading, “Rich Dad, Poor Dad” by Robert Kiyosaki. The very first lesson is that “rich people don’t work for money… they make money work for them.” And, within this lesson, another said, “we need to learn to control our emotions — to think before we act”.
Robert shares that most people (the 99%) are driven by the emotions of fear & greed… fear of not having enough money, and then greed about what things they will buy with the money they do get.
These two fears never completely go away. So, we need to learn to control them … to respond (after thinking), rather than react (without thinking).
After finishing chapter one, I set the book aside, needing time to let it all sink in. And, as I put some of my other books back on my shelf (ones I’d been reading the day before), my eye landed on “The Motivation Manifesto” by Brendon Burchard. So, I pulled it down and started skimming through it, as something in my gut prompted me to do so. And, sure enough, there was a whole chapter titled, “On Fear”. So, I sat down, and read through that chapter.
Where I started off, it talked about the “weaklings” — those who fear effort — calling them “worshippers of ease” and “escapists” (all of which struck a nerve). It talked about them having given up their power to absolve themselves of the responsibility of living a remarkable life. Ouch.
Brendon writes, “They don’t have the resolve to pursue their highest selves, or any meaningful purpose … [But] what good is a life without struggle? … What mastery can there be without real effort…?”
This made me think, again, about how I’ve never been driven towards “mastery” or “excellence” in anything. I’ve never cared to excel; good enough was good enough.
Yet, I’d also researched “work ethic”, this morning (along with what the Bible says about this topic), learning that it’s about dedicating oneself, and giving your all toward something… having certain principles that guide your work behavior. And, in combining that with these two new insights from these books, I’m starting to see that the value of all of this isn’t the outcome or the result. Its value actually lies in the fulfillment that comes from knowing you gave it your all, and –more importantly– that God is glorified by our dedication, integrity, diligence, and commitment to the task at hand.
For me, the outcome has almost never been worth the effort I’d have to expend; it wasn’t worth me forfeiting things I’d rather be doing with my time.
But that, there, is also faulty thinking: that “my time” is my own!
God says we are to be good stewards of this life, including — maybe especially — our time… because my whole purpose for existence is to know God, love God, and to make Him known… to do as He calls me to do… not to whittle away my days, being comfortable, scrolling social media, and gluttonously feeding my ego with motivational quotes.
So, the true fulfillment isn’t in what we get from the work we do (eg. the money, or all that it could buy). True fulfillment lies in giving our all to the work, itself, because that honors God — which is the whole point! In using the gifts and talents God gave us, in service to others (with a good attitude, and with excellence), we are bringing glory to God, and being –proving ourselves– set apart for the Kingdom.
And, honoring, and bringing glory to, God is FULLY worth my time… it’s the only thing that really is!
By knowing that our joy and fulfillment come through doing the work, it seems all the more imperative to me, too, that we choose work that best uses the talents and gifts God has given us… choosing work that brings us joy.
Do you know what work best aligns with YOUR talents & gifts? If not, feel free to set up a time to chat with me (30 minutes, no obligation), and we can get you some insight on that!
When you first start out in business for yourself, it’s so exciting to get everything set up. You choose a name for your company, you set up your website and social media platforms, you pick out a color scheme, and you decide what you’re going to offer to your audience. Best of all, you’re finally escaping the 9-to-5 grind… or, you’re starting on the path towards that. It’s only a matter of time.
After a couple of months of being “open”, and doing promotion and other things you’re supposed to do as a self-employed business owner, you start to get discouraged because, for all of your efforts, you’re mostly hearing crickets… maybe you got a little bit of interest, but it’s been nowhere near the fanfare (or income) that you’d expected.
What’s the deal? Are you just not cut out for this whole entrepreneurship thing? Are you just not trying hard enough?
Here’s a hint: Go back and re-read the first paragraph of this post, and notice the word that appears (in two versions), over and over throughout. Did you catch it?
That’s the problem. It’s been all about you. In actually, “your” business is supposed to be all about …them.
Who are they?
“They” are your audience and potential customers. Without them, you’ll never have a business, only have a hobby. Because, they are the ones who are supposed to be paying for your offerings.
Doesn’t it make sense, then, that it should be all about them?
So, let’s come at this from this new perspective. Let’s go back to the beginning and put this together with our audience in the spotlight.
START WITH WHY
In this book (and TED talk), “Start With Why“, Simon Sinek talks about how the most successful brands (eg. Apple, Inc.) don’t start with what they offer, but instead, why they’re offering it. The reason for this is because we, as consumers, shop first based on our emotional response — and then we justify our decisions with logic. It therefore makes sense to start by thinking about why you’re offering this particular product or service, and why your audience needs it. Also, why did you decide to get into this particular business?
Next, you’re going to need to think about who needs what you’ve got to offer. Whose problem aligns with why you feel compelled to be an entrepreneur?
After all, that’s what business is all about — solving the problems others have, and getting paid to do so. It’s an exchange of value.
The tricky part, here, is finding a balance between who has a problem you can solve, but also who fits the profile of someone you’d most like to work with, or serve.
Depending on your business model, this second bit may or may not matter. For example, if you’re opening a retail store, perhaps the customer’s personality type isn’t going to matter; whereas, if you’re offering a service like coaching others on-on-one (or, even in a group setting), it’s going to matter a great deal whether or not you and your customer get along!
This topic needs far more depth than I have the space to go into, in this post, so I’ll do another post about it at a later date (or, you can dig into this more with me, one-on-one).
Simon Sinek also says that “customers don’t buy what you do; they buy why and how“.
So, the next question you need to ask yourself is this: How will my product or service help my audience get what they want? How will it solve their most pressing problem?
Notice that you’re not yet touching on what the customer needs. They may not even know, yet, what they truly need. All they do know is that they have this problem, and they want relief… they want it solved.
So, answer the question they’re really asking, which is, “what’s in it for me?” How can you (your product/service) solve their problem?
Finally, you’ll need to come up with what you can offer that answers all of the above questions. To recap:
- Why are you offering this, and why does your audience need it?
- Who needs what you’ve got to offer?
- How does it benefit them? (What’s in it for them?)
There are other questions you’ll need to answer, of course (like how you’ll offer these solutions, what you’ll charge, etc).
The key, though, is to always keep your customer at the forefront of your mind in everything you do throughout “your” business.
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How has this post opened your eyes to changes you could make in your business set-up or thinking? Let me know in the comments (or, message me!)
Picture this: You find something to do that you really enjoy, so you dive in and completely, happily submerse yourself in learning all you can. You feel like you’ve found your “thing”.
But, after a while, you start to get restless. You wonder if this isn’t really your thing, after all, and your attention wanders.
All-of-a-sudden, you discover something else that ignites a spark in you! So, abandoning the first thing, you dive into this new thing and completely, happily submerse yourself in learning all you can.
But after a while, you once again start to feel restless…
I am here to reassure you that you are not actually “crazy” … or “flighty”… or “immature” … or “lazy”. You are, in fact, a multipassionate!
MULTIPASSIONATE: “a person who has many different interests and creative pursuits in life.” (aka: Renaissance Soul | Generalist | Scanner | Multipotenialite)
When I first discovered the concept of multipassionates, through reading “The Renaissance Soul” (Margaret Lobenstine), I was so relieved! Family had always told me I needed to “settle down” and “just pick something, already!” So, I was constantly at war within myself. It felt nearly impossible to choose one thing, and accept that this would be my fate. It scared me.
Yet, on learning that there were others who were just like me — that I wasn’t actually supposed to stay with one thing forever — I was overjoyed!
Back in the Renaissance days, studying in multiple fields was actually encouraged. It was a good thing to be interested in music, and art, and mathematics, and scientific inquiries.
And, check this out: It’s a very sought-after thing, these days, to be adaptable… to know a lot about many different topics is actually to your benefit! Employers love to see people who pick up new skills easily. You’re already ahead of those who don’t care to learn more, preferring to think they “know enough” already.
Here are just a few ways you can use this aspect of your personality to your advantage:
- Highlight your adaptability and flexibility when applying for jobs.
- Become a resource — share your knowledge wherever you see a need.
- Combine several of your loves to form a new path of employment for yourself!
- Appreciate the variety in your life — that you’re never stuck in one place, forever.
- Think about the many new people you’re getting to meet, in all of these different areas — this makes you a master networker!
So, be encouraged. Own the fact that you love a lot of things! Accept that you’ll always feel bored once you’ve “mastered” knowledge of a certain topic, and see it as a good thing that you’re ready to learn something new!
Do you ever just get so tired of trying to move forward? Do you have times where you’ve gone at things with such intensity for so long and, all-of-a-sudden, it hits you and you feel bone-weary? I do, too.
I’ve got a feisty, stubborn, independent spirit, so I tend to fight long and hard for what I believe in, and/or am passionate about. Yet, every now and then, I hit a wall, and I just cannot summon the strength to keep going.
Can you relate?
I’m not saying that I’ll give up entirely. Definitely not! But I think that life has a way of telling us that it’s time to slow down, step back, rest, and refresh. If we don’t pay attention, and we don’t take a breather once in a while, life seems to force us to do so, whether we want to or not!
Some of the ways I’ve found to help me slow down and regroup include the following:
LET IT GO
Instead of fighting to continue, I recognize my soul’s need for a time-out, and I mentally tell myself that it’s okay — that I have permission — to let things go for a while. It’s not forever. And, by taking some time off, I know I will come back to things with more clarity, and renewed energy, later on.
I got into the whole adult coloring trend, a year ago, along with the practice of Art Journaling. And, while I don’t pursue these things daily any more, I do find that they are very relaxing, they allow me to “zone out”, and they get me into a creative “flow” state for a while.
LISTEN TO MUSIC
Along with getting my creative juices flowing, I also love to put my earphones on, crank up my favorite music, and tune out the world for a couple of hours. Combining my coloring time with listening to music has a really beneficial effect on my state of being. It calms me and brings me joy.
Because I’m such an avid nonfiction reader, I’m constantly soaking up knowledge, and learning, usually taking notes while I read.
So, every now and then, I find I have to force myself to dig into a novel (fiction) in order to just relax with my book, and “escape” the world around me. I am always happy after having done so, too!
Now, because everyone is unique, the things I do to step back and relax may be different from the things you would enjoy. The point, though, is to find what it is that helps bring you a sense of calm, and then make time for that in your day-to-day.
How long you take time off for will always depend on your unique circumstances. If you pay attention, your body and soul will let you know when it’s time to pick up where you left off. If necessary, you can always set yourself a flexible deadline — once that date comes, you can then check in with yourself, see how you feel, and decide whether you need a bit more time, or if you’re ready to roll.
We aren’t meant to always be “on”. Even the Master Creator (God) took time off after creating the world! Follow His example, and take a break when you need to.
How do YOU make the time to relax? What are your favorite downtime activities that help you feel refreshed?
When is the last time you tried to change a habit? How did you do? Were you successful?
A lot of people do okay for a little while, but then things come up, and they find themselves reverting back to their old ways.
In the past, you might have been told, and/or believed that you just needed some stronger willpower. Nowadays, however, it’s coming to light that that’s maybe not the case.
Instead, a better method is to find your “why”.
Your why is the soul-deep reason behind the changes you’re wanting to make.
In her book, “F.I.T: 10 Steps to Your Faith Inspired Transformation“, Kim Dolan Leto recommends that your “why” be rooted in one of three areas: relational, medical, or spiritual. The reason for this is that these are areas most closely tied to our core values. As such, our why— our reason for wanting to change — will be super-strong, and will have its roots deep enough to keep us motivated and moving forward, even when life tries to throw us curve balls, and derail our plans.
To give you an example, my own “why” is two-fold: spiritual and medical. First, I want to be able to live life to the fullest, and I can’t do that if I’m unable to get my butt off the couch. Second, I’m tired of feeling like a “victim” in my life, and am aiming to build up my strength, physically. I started with going to the gym. Now, I’m turning my focus to eating better, and to continuing my strength-training from home.
Life has definitely tried to mess with my plans, several times in the past year. But remembering my reasons for making these changes has helped me to continue. Thinking of my “why” re-lights that deep, inner fire to change my life for the better.
So, give some thought to this. See if you can find a soul-deep reason for the changes that you want to make. Make sure that this reason really touches something at the core of you, as then it will be deeply-rooted, and nothing will be able to stop you from reaching your goals.